Today I had a rare
treat where the girls actually slept in (oh PLEASE let this be a new phase!!! I
could totally use one on the positive side), so we got a later start. I knew I
needed to go to Sams today, so I presented that to them. They're always happy
to go anywhere, so they asked for dresses and their boots - cuz Sams is fancy
like that… Finally we're all dressed, fed and out the door into one of the most
spectacular mornings I've ever seen! The girls run and squeal in the sunshine.
As the sun comes through the old oaks and dances across them, it strikes me as
a perfect picture time. In case you weren't aware, preschoolers suddenly become
misshapen trolls when asked to smile for a camera…. It's a thing. After about
15 pics I think I have one that works.
The four year old does this ridiculously overdone cheshire cat grin
while the two and a half year old believes that looking at her shoes or scowling as she walks away is the correct
camera protocol. At some point I give up and begin getting them into the
vehicle so we can just go. I get them both buckled in and get rolling. I get to
Sams and cannot find my phone… ruh roh… thinking… thinking… think…oh no. I
think I put it on the top of the truck bed cover…
This is that moment
were you feel a little sick to your stomach and begin to panic. Thankfully, God
has children wired to nut up at that exact moment to use it as
frustration/distraction. Thanks… I think. We get focused and get shopping.
We're out of like…everything. Now I am a very biased momma when I say my girls
are beautiful - but it's true, too. My girls draw people likes flies. They may
be different ages but they are the exact same size and weight. Seriously. Down
to the ounce. Great for clothes buying, fun for causing people to stumble over
their words. Personality wise they are night and day but will tell you they're
best friends. May that ever be so. Today, was no different. We couldn't go an
aisle without people gushing and asking if they're twins. I always respond with
"Nope" and wait a while before I offer the answer to their confusion.
Seventeen months difference. Then they're even more puzzled… They're the same
size, staring back at them with the same deep blue eyes. Nope. I'm not wrong. I
promise I'd know… We finally wade thru the sea of admirers,
plus one sketchy dude that I think was
following us for a bit until I turned a corner, then waited for him in a
"come at me bro" kinda way complete with eye contact…he took off
quickly. Momma don't play. We finally got
and get out of the door with a few slices of pizza for lunch and head
home to eat them.
Once home, we all
begin to circle the yard, drive, etc looking for the phone. To no avail. That
sinking feeling getting deeper. I'm about to have to tell my husband that my
scatterbrained, forgetful self just cost us a smartphone… He's not going to be
happy. He is always gracious, but he will still not be happy. I get the girls
going on their pizza and check the house phone. There are missed calls from my
hubs. I call him back. Some dude found my phone on the side of the road.
(Deeeeeeeeeeeeeep breath of relief). Found out where to go pick it up, snag
kids mid meal and we retrieve phone, after missing the turnoff twice… Come
home, and unpack truck (forgot about the other food). In the process, I spilled
raspberries I bought for hubs who also had a panicky morning wondering if his
girls were all okay. I spilled chicken juice in the truck (rotisserie chickens
and juicy), but cleaned it up with a spare pair of four year old underwear in
the truck - don't judge me. Potty trained ain't truly potty trained for years
to come. Spares are always a thing. Everywhere…. So, I brought the chicken and
the undies back into the house, put the undies in the laundry room and the
chicken in the fridge and went back for more groceries. I had just finished
when I realized the ancient deaf blind dog was chewing on said undies that he
had retrieved from the hamper. I wrestled those from him as he was COMPLETELY
against my idea and going all pitbull on the chickeny undies. I finally got
them back and into the wash, got the girls who were long since done with their
pizza playing with legos and finally sat down to my own very cold pizza…. I
have the line from mulan after she's found out by her fellows that she's a she,
sitting in the snow saying, "I should never have left home…".
Man, it's been a day
and it's only lunchtime…
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